“I told you, Elena. I told you this one was mine.”
“He’s ours, Aaron.”
“You know what I mean.”
I did. Four daughters had been enough for me long before this pregnancy, but I’d stopped saying it once I realized how badly Aaron wanted a son. It was easier to smile when he talked about trying again than to watch the disappointment cross his face.
“He’s been a lifesaver.”
I remembered the hospital room after Ava — our fourth daughter, pink and squalling in my arms — and Aaron kissing her forehead before whispering, not unkindly, “Next time.” I remembered the small room at the end of the hall he’d painted slate blue three years ago, the wooden train set already waiting on the shelf.
“Michael dropped off dinner at the house last night,” Aaron said. “Lasagna. Said to tell you congratulations in advance.”
“He’s been a lifesaver these last few months.”
“He really has.”
“You two look comfortable.”
Michael had done the school runs when my back gave out in the third trimester. He had picked up Chloe from ballet, sat with Ava at the pediatrician when I was on bed rest, brought us groceries on Sunday afternoons. Aaron’s best friend since they were fourteen — tall and easy, part of the furniture of our lives.
Once, Aaron had come home early and found Michael and me laughing over coffee at the kitchen table.
“You two look comfortable,” he’d said.
He’d smiled when he said it, and I’d rolled my eyes. But that night, he asked how often Michael came by when he wasn’t home.
“He’s healthy. Seven pounds, four ounces.”
I’d laughed then, too. I hadn’t thought there was anything underneath the question.
I thought of him suddenly at a pool party two summers ago, climbing out of the water while Lily shrieked from his shoulders. His shirt had ridden up as he bent to set her down, briefly exposing the pale crescent-shaped mark near his lower back.
Then the memory slipped away as another wave of exhaustion pulled me under.
“Elena,” the doctor said from the doorway, her mask lowered, her eyes crinkling. “You did beautifully. He’s healthy. Seven pounds, four ounces.”
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